Jokes About Women
What They Say And What They Really Mean

Women

Yes = No

No = Yes

Maybe = No

I'm sorry. = You'll be sorry.

We need = I want

It's your decision. = The correct decision should be obvious by now.

Do what you want. = You'll pay for this later!

We need to talk. = I need to complain.

Sure... go ahead = I don't want you to.

I'm not upset. = Of course I'm upset, you moron!

You're certainly attentive tonight. = Is sex all you ever think about?

This kitchen is so inconvenient. = I want a new house.

I want new curtains. = and carpeting, and furniture, and wallpaper...

Hang the picture there. = NO, I mean hang it there!

I heard a noise. = I noticed you were almost asleep.

Do you love me? = I'm going to ask for something expensive.

How much do you love me? = I did something today you're really not going to like.

I'll be ready in a minute. = Kick off your shoes and find a good game on T.V.

(Read Related : What Women Want)

Is my butt fat? = Tell me I'm beautiful.

You have to learn to communicate. = Just agree with me.

Are you listening to me!? = {Too late, you're dead}

Was that the baby? = Why don't you get out of bed and walk him until he goes to sleep?

I'm not yelling! = Yes I am yelling because I think this is important.

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