Things Guys Wish
Girls Knew
2. If you think you're fat, you probably are.
Don't ask us.
3. Learn to work the toilet seat: if it's up put it down.
4. Don't cut your hair. Ever.
5. Birthdays, Valentines, and Anniversaries are not quests
to see if he can find the perfect present, again!
6. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect
an answer you don't want to hear.
7. Sometimes, he's not thinking about you. Live with it.
8. Don't ask him what he's thinking about unless you are
prepared to discuss such topics as navel lint, the shotgun
formation and monster trucks.
9. Get rid of your cat. And no, it's not different, it's
just like every other cat.
10. Dogs are better than ANY cats. Period.
(Read Related : Why
Girls Like Guys)
11. Sunday = Sports. It's like the full moon or the changing
of the tides. Let it be.
12. Shopping is not a sport.
13. Anything you wear is fine. Really.
14. You have enough clothes.
15. You have too many shoes.
16. Crying is blackmail. Use it if you must, but don't
expect us to like it.
17. Your brother is an idiot, you ex-boyfriend is an idiot
and your Dad probably is too.
18. Ask for what you want. Subtle hints don't work.
19. No, he doesn't know what day it is. He never will.
Mark anniversaries on a calendar.
20. Yes, pissing standing up is more difficult than peeing from
point blank range. We're bound to miss sometimes.
(Read Related : Boys
And Girls)
21. Most guys own two or three pairs of shoes -- What makes
you think we'd be any good at choosing which pair,
out of thirty, would look good with your dress?
22. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers.
23. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See
a doctor.
24. Your Mom doesn't have to be our best friend.
25. Foreign films are best left to foreigners.
26. Check you oil.
27. Don't give us 50 rules when 25 will do.
28. Don't fake it. We'd rather be ineffective than deceived.
29. It is neither in your best interest or ours to take
the quiz together.
30. Anything we said 6 or 8 months ago is inadmissible
in an argument. All comments become null and void after
7 days.
31. If you don't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls,
don't expect us to act like soap opera guys.
32. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and
one of the ways makes you sad and angry, we meant the other
one.
33. Let us ogle. If we don't look at other women, how can
we know how pretty you are?
34. You can either ask us to do something OR tell us how
you want it done -- not both.
35. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to
say during commercials.
36. Christopher Columbus didn't need directions, and neither
do we.
37. Women wearing Wonder bras and low-cut blouses lose
their right to complain about having their boobs stared
at.
38. Consider Golf a mini-vacation from you. We need it,
just like you do.
39. Telling us that the models in the men's magazines are
airbrushed makes you look jealous and petty and it's certainly
not going to deter us from reading the magazine.
40. The relationship is never going to be like it was the
first two months we were going out.
AND FINALLY, THE NUMBER ONE RULE:
1. Don't rub the lamp if you don't want the genie to come
out.
Reviews or comments on Things Guys Wish Girls Knew
